"When did you become a Christian?" Stroble asked. "I made a profession of
faith at a summer camp when I was 11, but I felt like a hypocrite afterwards. I
was supposed to have committed my life to Jesus, but I wasn't even sure there
was a Jesus. I felt like a liar."
Stroble asked if doubt was all the guy ever felt.
"Sometimes I would really sense God's presence. I would ride home from
school in a snowstorm at twilight singing hymns and feeling I was in God's
hands. But a lot of the time, I didn't believe in Him- at least, not like my
church friends."
"Were you afraid they would find out?" Lee asked
Lynn.
“Absolutely! I was scared they'd think I was bad, or be angry with me, or
think my parents were spiritual failures. I was afraid my parents would be
disappointed or ashamed."
Can you relate? Are your doubts right there in the front
of your mind? Do you feel like a hypocrite, a fake? First, before you read
anymore I want you to understand what faith isn't.
“Most people think that doubt is the opposite of faith, but it isn't. The
opposite of faith is unbelief, which is the willful refusal to believe or a
deliberate decision to disobey God.” - Lee Stroble
Faith doesn't equal
feelings-
Lynn Anderson the "church kid" who struggled with doubt shared this about
faith and feelings.
"I tend to be emotionally up and down. It took me years to figure out
that this doesn't mean my faith is getting weaker or stronger. That's why we
have to be careful about our feelings—they can be fickle."
In Galatians 3 Paul was writing to the Galatians who were
also struggling with faith. He says to them,
"Are you so foolish having begun by the Spirit are you now being
perfected by the flesh?"
We so often fall into the trap that if our feelings aren't there, then the faith must not be either. But
Paul was saying Christ saved you and now you think that you are going to finish
that work by doing it your way?!
What! No way, Christ started it, He'll
finish it.
When I feel like some thing is missing emotionally from my faith life, I
go to the Psalms. The Psalms give such a great picture of what normal faith is
like! We tend to focus on the upbeat Psalms, but check it out, 60% of them are
laments, with people screaming out, "God where are you?" When you find feelings
lacking in your faith, tell yourself like the
Psalmist did truths about YOUR Father.
HE IS
UNCHANGING
Psalm 102:27 "But you are always the same; you will live forever."
HIS AFFECTION IS UNCHANGING
Deuteronomy 10:15 "Yet the LORD set his affection on your forefathers and
loved them, and He chose you."
HE CARES FOR YOU
1 Peter 5:7 "Cast your cares upon HIM for He cares for you."
HIS PROMISES NEVER CHANGE
2 Cor. 1:20, "For no matter how many promises God has made they are YES
in Christ."
HE IS POWERFUL
Psalm 52:1, "Power belongs to the LORD."
HIS PERSPCETIVE OF YOU NEVER CHANGES
Luke 12:7, “Do not fear you are MORE VALUABLE than many
sparrows.”
HE LISTENS TO ME
Psalm 55:19, "God, who has ruled forever, will hear me."
HE PARDONS ALL MY SINS
Psalm 103:3, "Bless the LORD... who pardons all my iniquities."
HE HEALS MY HEARTS SICKNESS
Psalm 103:3, "Who heals all your diseases."
HE IS MY RESCUER
Cols 1:13, “Who rescues me from the domain of darkness and transfers us
to the Kingdom of
His Beloved
Son."
HE RELEASES ME FROM FEAR
2 Tim 1:17, “God
didn't It -give us a spirit that
makes us weak and fearful. He gave us a spirit that gives us power and love.
It helps us control ourselves.
HE REDEEMS ME
Psalm 103:4, "Who redeems your life from
the pit."
HE IS IN LOVE WITH ME
Rev 1:5, "Jesus Christ...to Him who
continually loves us...."
...and the list goes on and on. Instead of focusing on your lack of
feelings, focus on his abundance of
blessings!
Faith doesn't equal lack of doubt-
Some people think faith equals a lack of doubt, but that's not biblical.
One of my favorite Bible verses that I pray over and over again when I am in the
darkness of doubt is
"Lord I do believe help my unbelief" (Mark 9:14-27). I can
so connect with that. There is a man coming before Jesus to have his
demon-possessed son healed. And Jesus says, "All things are possible to him who
believes." So the dad's reply? "I do believe help my unbelief!"
His belief, his trust, his confident expectation was in Jesus. That was obvious because of all the magicians,
sorcerers, or religious people to whom this dad could have brought his son, but
he didn’t.
He brought him to Jesus. How do you or I respond when a challenge,
a heart break, or a disappointment come at us? We run to Jesus.
"But if I
believe I shouldn't be having doubts or challenges, my faith should be strong
enough that it's not affected by bad things." I totally understand. I used
to think that way too. But if your faith is never challenged how does it grow?
James 1:3 says, "Knowing that the testing of
your faith produces endurance." If you always feel the sweetness of the presence
of God how can you practice faith in Him? If you are never challenged by hard
questions and doubts, why would you ever try and learn more, try and satisfy
your questions? Doubts can help you
develop a stronger and more realistic faith, if you don't let them beat you
down. The next verse in James is our encouraging promise of that very
thing.
“And let
endurance (produced from your trial) have its perfect result, so that you may be
perfect and complete, lacking in nothing” James 1:4.
Lee Stroble, atheist, saved by God's
grace, as a new Christian was challenged by a
scientist who had been trying to disprove Christian faith. Finally after a few
hours of going back and forth Lee told the guy this, "I can't answer all your
questions- but for 2,000 years people have been trying to destroy the foundation
of Christianity and I don't think you'll be the first to succeed."
So ask questions if you have doubts, check them out and hold on to this
promise, "Seek (and keep seeking) and you WILL find, knock (and keep knocking)
and the door WILL be opened, ask (and keep
asking) and it will be given” Matthew 7:7.
Faith, act of will or gift of
God?
The Bible talks about faith as a precious gift from God. It also talks
about choosing or refusing to believe. Yea there's tension in seeing those two
sides but this is where it leads me.
I shouldn't get cocky because I have faith and take credit for it like
it's something I worked up on my own.
"For by grace you have been saved, through faith not of yourselves, it is
a GIFT of God not as a result of works, so that no one can boast" Eph.
2:8-9.
But God never (let me say it again) NEVER EVER
withholds that gift from anyone (again let me
say it) ANY ONE who wants to believe, so it's not realistic to say "I'd like to
believe but God just hasn't given me faith." Let me rephrase what you've just
said. "I want to believe but then I'd have to give up partying." "I want to have
faith but then I'd have the responsibility faith brings with it." “I can't
believe it would mean focusing on someone other than me."
God will never give you the desire to be saved and
not give you the faith needed to believe.
So you're struggling but you realize it's ok. You want to defeat doubt?
That's awesome. It means there is
faith there alive and fighting.
First I would encourage you to seek out people whom you respect because
of their Christian life, whom you look at and say, "They’re awesome! They really
seek the Lord, and I want to be like that."
"Just as iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens another."
"But I don't have that right now." That's probably the
case for many of you. I encourage you then to follow the
example of the Psalmist:
“Bless the Lord oh my soul and all that is in me bless
His holy name. Bless the Lord oh my soul and forget none of His benefits; Who
pardons all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases who redeems your life
from the pit. Who crowns you with loving kindness and compassion" Ps.
103:1-4.
David, instead of focusing on his
surroundings and his insecurities, was talking to himself, he was telling
himself all that the Lord had done. He was reminding himself how wonderful the
Lord was even when things around him where rocky and his faith life was going
through some dark doubts. He
focused on God.
So I encourage you, “Taste and see that the Lord is good”
Ps 34:8.
I still struggle with doubts, big ones. My faith still
comes in waves where it's big and washes over me and every area of my life, then
other days it's like it's just barely reaching my toes. But I'm experiencing God
more and more. I can even see God in my trials and I see Him building faith on
those days where He feels so far away.
It's funny, I know I don't have all the answers about faith, doubts, and
Jesus but that doesn't matter to me so much anymore because I'm coming to a
point where I taste, I see, and I know, the Lord is good!